If I say “Monday” what pops into your mind?  Pictures of Grumpy Cat? Does your mood change?  Why?  It doesn’t have too.   Let me tell you a story about my husband.      My husband is a very kind, generally patient, and understanding person, but Monday’s used to always change his mood and set a tone for the whole day.  When he came home and I asked about his day he would grumble and complain and make grumbly noises.  I asked him why Monday’s were so bad and he complained that Monday just always seemed to get the best of him. He struggled with feeling behind, disorganized, and just out of sorts.   When we tried to break it down there was really nothing different about Monday except that it followed a break from working.    My husband loves his job, enjoys his client and co-workers and as a rule is very satisfied with his career. But still, there was Monday!  I thought about this for a while and tried something new.  Psyching him up!!  As he left the house in the morning I gave him his usual kiss, hug, and encouragements for the day, but this time I made an angry face-ok, I don’t do these well and mostly he thought I was cute, but he understood my goal.  Anyway, I made an angry face and balled up my fists and so “Go get em!! Conquer Monday!  Monday is not the boss of you, YOU are the boss of it!!!  Get things done, stay on task, and have fun in the face of Monday!!!  You like your job, you can do this.  Conquer Monday  grrrrrrrrr” ,  It takes a special man to live with me.  And you know what? It worked.  He came home a different man and felt kind of exhilarated about defeating Monday.   We did this same routine for months, but we don’t anymore.  Monday is no longer a big deal for him.  He conquered it and he doesn’t need a cheerleader for Mondays anymore.  Monday is just another day.    Now, let’s look at this. Monday is not even a thing, you can’t touch it or hold it.  Monday has no feelings or attitude.  Monday just exists, like any other day.  What really got conquered?  His attitude!!   Attitude is really what it is about.  Monday is all about your frame of mind.  Monday is about what you make it to be.  If you go into the day with a bad attitude that Monday sucks, your job sucks, your life sucks uggghhh “I hate Mondays” then it will be a bad day.  You can’t change Monday being a Monday, but you can change how it goes down or at least how you feel about it.  You can change your attitude. You have a choice.  Bad things may happen, but still the choice is yours. Think of the positives Decide you are the boss of Monday Give yourself a few extra minutes on Mondays to get you ready for the day pray do a facial get a cup of coffee go out to breakfast meet a friend go for a walk When you get to work prioritize the day Take a minute to remember what you like about your job.  If there isn’t anything, at least be happy for the provision and be hopeful. Go out! Conquer Monday, you can do it!  Be amazing!!!! Grrrrrrrr!

Have you ever watched “What not to Wear” on TLC?  What Not to Wear is a makeover show, but touches the people on a deep personal level, not just “fix them up” and I think you should watch it.  Not for fashion tips,  but to understand loving the body you have.   Clinton Kelly  and Stacey London , the hosts, consistently teach people that they have to dress the body they have and not the body they wish they had.  Part of this teaching process involves the idea that you are beautiful/handsome just as you are! Here are some ways to get you started loving your body: If you criticize your body, STOP!  Would you let a friend talk that way about someone else? If not, that don’t talk that way about yourself. Be honest and realistic.  You may be overweight or underweight, but it is important to accept where you are, especially if you want to change it.  Before we make change though, we must learn to like ourselves or we aren’t worth it enough in our own minds to make the change! Don’t let your body image stop you from doing the things you love.  If you can physically do it don’t talk yourself out of it.  Remaining active effects our mental well being Take walks to help you mental health and be active Bless your body.  This one sounds weird, but a counselor once had me do this and it was remarkable!  In the shower as you wash your body touch every part of yourself and say a prayer of blessing or tell yourself you are happy for that part and why.  You are learning to accept yourself and a little praise too. Dress the body you have and not the body you want.  Buying clothes that fit well makes us look better and accentuates the positives.  White girls this is especially for you, follow the lead of our Latino and African American girlfriends who are much more happy with their bodies statistically than white women.  One of my black girlfriends says this is what you do.  You stand tall and you say “That’s right, I’m hot, mmm, look at me gurl!, Oh, yea”  as you run your hand down your side and strut your stuff!  She was right, it is kind of empowering!! Don’t blame your body on the bad things that happen in life No one can make you feel inferior without your consent – Eleanor Roosevelt.  Don’t let comments by others ruin your mood, day, or actions.  This means you too!  Your comments about yourself are making you feel inferior. Consider taking up something like Yoga or meditation where you learn practices that encourage being grateful for our bodies. Remember that no one has a perfect body, even the women in the magazines.  They were Photo Shopped and have cellulite, blemishes, etc.  If your goal is a “perfect” body it is unrealistic, change your goal to have a fit body even if your fit is bigger, smaller, different from someone else’s fit body.  Just be healthy. Practice Mindful Eating Once you decide you love yourself it is OK to say that you would like to change a few things like lose a few pounds or gain a few pounds, dress better, learn something new etc., but start with loving yourself.  The next step is to make an honest assessment and goal and then take realistic steps to get there and make the change!  You can do it!

Reposted from March 21, 2013 I work for a church. This is an interesting environment where there is great opportunity for the organizers and the dreamy thinkers to get together, it might even make something groovy! Let me start by telling you who Dharma and Greg are, just in case you’re not in the loop. Here is a quote explaining the TV show "Dharma and Greg" taken from Wikipedia.com “ Free spirited Yoga instructor Dharma and Lawyer Greg get married on their first date despite being complete opposites . Their conflicting views lead to comical situations. Greg's parents and Dharma's parents are totally different . But over time they too learn to like each other causing a unique family blend “. So, in other words the hippie marries the lawyer and the fun begins. That is the premise of the show and Dharma and Greg learn how to work as a team. (If you haven’t seen this show-check it out, but be warned there is mature content). I have had wonderful opportunities to hear great speakers and attend fantastic conferences, like Catalyst by Andy Stanley and his team (Andy Stanley is a one of many gifted speakers who teach church staffs how to work together, grow, lead, and build while keeping Christ at the center and our keeping co-workers hearts in mind) and the ACS Technologies conferences (ACS is a church database software provider and much more, plus they hold conferences helping churches grow practically and spiritually). In the conferences I discovered that the church I worked for was no different from many others. I heard the “Greg’s” say things like “sigh, I can’t just make it happen. You have to plan” and the “Dharma’s” say things like “I don’t know why my team is always shooting down my great ideas?” And the fact is they are both right, if we are not carful that is how it can be or if we are not truly listening that is how it can seem. The Type A, organized, planners thrive on having a plan and ticking off each task on the list and have every detail planned out, while the free spirited creative ones equally thrive on the excitement that is produced with the newest idea. They see how the people will love it and get involved how their lives may be changed or how they might just have fun. Neither side is wrong and both need each other. The problem arises when we don’t speak the other person’s language or at least hear the language. When the “Greg’s” are telling the “Dharma’s” things like: Did you make sure we have enough chairs? Does it conflict with anything on the calendar? Do you need A/V? Will there be childcare? Etc. Dharma often hears “nope, not gonna work, I don’t think I can partner with you in this, uh-huh won’t work.” Or When the “Dharma’s” say “oooooohhhh, I have great idea… we could have floats, and prizes, and… and doves…. Or What if there was a giant ice cream Sunday….?” the “Greg’s” often miss the real vision and heart of the idea and get so turned off by the wide-open free spiritedness that they miss an opportunity to make ministry happen. I love the tagline from the “Dharma and Greg” show “She's got her head in the clouds. He's got his feet on the ground. Together, they're a match made in heaven.” A match made in heaven… I think that is true. By taking time to understand the differences and appreciate them we can have the perfect marriage-even if it has bumps and a little comedy. So next time Greg can say “wow, what a great idea, I really love your creativity. You know what, I’m organized and can probably make that happen for you-but no doves” and “Dharma” can say “I have a great idea, but I need your strengths in organization to make it happen, can we work together on this? Oh, ok… no doves. What about balooons??” In addition to how we respond we need to listen differently. Take the earlier statement “Did you make sure we have enough chairs? Does it conflict with anything on the calendar? Do you need A/V? Will there be childcare? Etc.” in this statement “Dharma” needs to hear the desire to make her idea really happen and say “wow, I’m so glad you have the bases covered, those are great questions, let’s get together and try to answer those questions.  But..really... no doves???  And like wise “Dharma’s” Statement “oooooohhhh, I have great idea… we could have floats, and prizes, and… and doves…. Or What if there was a giant ice cream Sunday….?” “Greg needs to hear this as an opportunity to touch lives, real people, not just boxes on a task list and to see the workable plan within what he is hearing. And Yes...really!!, … No doves, but giant ice cream Sunday-I’m there!” So, as they say “that’ll preach” Maybe Dharma and Greg will be topics at the next Catalyst?? In the mean time remember your a team and fun things can happen and happen with excellence...but probably no doves.